Moms, Dads, Parent 1 and Parent 2, stop wrapping your kids in bubble wrap when they leave the house!
After spending 20 years analyzing the effects of hide-and-seek on children's psychological and physiological development, the Canadian Pediatric Society has just released new guidelines for the games your cherubs can now play!
Small children can now climb trees!
To argue!
Hide behind bushes!
To ride a bike fast!
And play King of the Mountain in winter!
Yes, I know: these are dangerous games! Aggressive! Even daring, dazzling and violent!
But according to experts who have studied the topic of microscopes, these dangerous and high-risk activities would be beneficial for young people!
Goodbye, woke up!
After 20 years of raising little rabbits in disinfected basements, parents can finally do this! – Take your children out of the cozy cotton blanket and confront them with real life!
That means in danger!
Risk of injury! Fell off the bicycle! To scratch your knees! Falling down a snow mountain! Lose a battle!
Message to employers in Quebec: Be patient, in 20 years you will be able to criticize your young employees without them curling up in a corner and crying their eyes out!
Thanks to these new guidelines from Canadian pediatricians, they will finally have a hard shell, a shell!
They will take criticism!
You will no longer collapse at the slightest reproach or the slightest sideways glance!
Hallelujah! Many thanks to John XXIII. for the favors received!
It's the guards who must have gone crazy when they read this (bad) news…
Because it marks the end of their movement!
As young people start to toughen up, we no longer need to remove Tim and Lucky Luke from library shelves to protect them!
You'll be able to read Asterix without crying!
They even will – who knows? – Develop… a sense of humor! Seize the second degree!
Start vacuuming!
Imagine?
There will no longer be any need to set up ambulances outside the rooms where Guy Nantel performs to look after the hypersensitive little rabbits!
“Marie Claire? Quick, prepare a stretcher, there's a young girl who's not feeling well because she just heard a joke about drag queens!”
HAVE YOU SEEN RICHARD?
I don't want to sound old, but… do you know what my friends and I did when we were young?
We made soap boxes.
Small wooden carts with bicycle wheels.
We sat in it and slid down the slopes at lightning speed.
We also made crossbows out of a wooden plank, a clothespin and a rubber band.
And on Saturday morning we hopped on our bike with a banana seat and Brando grips and rode around camp until dinner. No cellphone.
When my mother wanted to know where I was, she called Madame Tremblay. Who called Madame Villeneuve? Who called Madame Gélinas? He said to him: “Ah, he is with the little neighbor who plays the doctor under the gallery!” »
It was a good time.
We laughed at each other, we ate mud.
And while Beau Dommage sang to the words of Pierre Huet, we spent three hours in an igloo.
That we, two or three people, were at Guy Rondoux's house.
There is mistrust
We have lost count of the number of coaches accused of assaulting young athletes. Result: We become paranoid.
Does this coach hugging my son to comfort him for his poor performance have bad intentions or is he just being caring?
In schools, teachers who have nothing to blame now refuse to welcome students into their offices for fear of being falsely accused of wrongdoing or being looked down upon by their colleagues.
Result: Young people have fewer and fewer opportunities to confide in authority figures.
Damage…
THE NORTHVOLT DILEMMA
Should we allow a company that helps fight pollution to endanger biodiversity?
This question arises at Northvolt.
On the one hand, this electric battery components factory will allow us to reduce our CO2 emissions. On the other hand, construction will destroy wetlands.
So what do we do? Do we choose the lesser of two evils?
At the QUB, former environment minister Daniel Breton told me that he believes it is wrong for the government to allow Northvolt to evade the BAPE process.
Because that only feeds the cynicism of the population.
It's not easy being green in 2024…
Least bad
In the USA, left-wing activists will vote less for Biden and more against Trump.
In Canada, left-wing activists will vote less for Trudeau and more against Poilievre.
More and more people are voting “strategically.”
Remember the days when we voted for the best candidate rather than the worst?
To paraphrase Aznavour: I speak to you of a time that those under 20 (if not 40 or 50) cannot know…